6.21.2013

Five Minute Friday: Rhythm

Hey there Friday Friends.

It's the first day of summer. It's still 80 some degrees here at 8 PM and I'm thinking when I wrap this up I'm gonna celebrate with a cocktail or a treat. Just because it's summer and I can. :)

Evening Walk for a Sweet Treat in the Hill


My week started off strong and organized but sort of lost traction the second half. Seems to happen often...which is why I keep missing #FMF. I'm sorta bummed I missed last week because I really liked the word: listen. 

But instead, I'm writing about RHYTHM.

The rules:
1. Write for five minutes. No editing.
2. Share over at Lisa Jo's blog.
3. Read and comment on your fellow linked-up writer buddies. Sharing is caring.

I booked the DJ for our wedding today. He's a local guy who spins 45's of dance music from the 50's to the 80's. We've seen him a couple times around town and he is going to be so fun. T is not a dancer...well not much that I've seen except for when we are in the car. :) If in the right mood, I love to dance. Just relax and let loose. 
The rhythm we have is a little different. Not just in dancing, but the ebb and flow of our life. I like a steady, busy pace- days filled with work and writing and running and people and appointments and cooking. I like my time FULL and to feel utterly tired and spent in the best kind of way when it's time to hit the sheets. T likes a little bit of a slower pace- time to relax and recharge and just be- no agenda. I like that too- but a little less frequently than he does.
In the larger sense- the tempo of our life is the same. We both are achievers, travelers and lovers of life. We like to be spontaneous and adventurous  We like to spend time together listening to music, riding bicycles, talking and just being together. 
Coming together in marriage and building a life together has me thinking about what our conjoined song will be...how our rhythms will meld and possibly change. 
I'm looking forward to building a harmony. 

That was really 6ish minutes, but I had to finish my train of thought. :)

And just because I can't get the word LISTEN out of my head, you get another one this week too:

I don't always listen that well. Often, when someone is talking to me, I find myself trying to form an answer or response in my head while they are still talking. Mostly because I want to remember what they are saying and what my reaction is, but then I can sometimes miss an additional point they are making because I'm wrapped up in my own response.
I especially don't listen well if I'm being talked at as opposed to talked to. I don't listen well if someone is sharing their opinion on a matter important to me in a way I don't agree. I don't listen well if someone is questioning a decision I made or am making that I've already questioned enough on my own. 
Last week, I had 3 different opportunities to listen well. To hear what someone else was trying to tell me and be open and value their views and thoughts. 
In all three instances, I failed miserably. I failed to listen to a friend who is struggling to find balance. Instead, I ended the conversation frustrated and confused because she couldn't understand my view. I failed to listen to a family member who was really trying to reach out for a friend. Instead, I let my emotions and my past resentment over a personal matter interfere and end the conversation. I failed to listen to my dearest friend when they were trying to help me see how I was a crappy listener. (Isn't that a kick in the ass). Instead, I got annoyed and angry and declared 'I don't want to talk about this anymore.'
I felt slightly justified in each case that my reactions were expected and okay. I tried to comfort myself with the thought that maybe they were attacking me and they deserved the snarkiness or blunt honesty I dished out. 
However, in all 3 cases, I think I was mostly to blame. I wasn't a good friend or family member. I didn't listen for the underlying concerns. If I had, I would have heard a friend who is on the verge reaching out for comfort and love. I would have heard a family member voicing honest love and reaching out for a listening ear, instead of getting defensiveness and snarky opinions  I would have heard my dearest friend just telling me he loves me and that maybe sometimes I should just learn to LISTEN. 


Eh...went over on that one too. Had to get it out!!
I'm working on the listening thing. I know I'm opinionated but sometimes I should learn to just bite my tongue, eh?:)

Happy First Day of Summer readers.
Hope you enjoyed the longest, most sunshiny day of the year.

Don't forget to link up over at Lisa Jo's blog and share the love. <3